Bethesda Bound
by snipoppers16
Summary: The girls come home after a year apart. Time and distance have taken a toll on their relationship, and it is up to the Pants to reunite them. Rated T for mature situations and high drama.
1. Prologue

It's been almost a year since we left for college, and we're all coming home for the summer. Now, I know you're wondering who "we" are. We are the Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants. You may have heard about us, if you have, you can go ahead and skip ahead a little bit.

There are four girls, each completely different from the others that composes us. We were all born around the beginning of September, big deal, right? Well, yeah. You see, our common due date is what united our mothers, who spent the summer prior to our births taking a prenatal aerobics class. Embarrassing, perhaps, but it was the 80's. They deserve some slack. I mean, we did do the Macarena back in 1997. Anyway, while most of the mothers were due in winter, our mothers were given a break in fear of overstressing themselves. They bonded during this sweaty summer, and after we were all born, all the new mothers used their group to collectively raise us.

More specifically us is Lena, Carmen, Tibby, and me, Bridget. Though when we were raised, my twin brother Perry was part of the mix, though that quickly ended. After a few years things changed and our mothers grew apart. They adapted different things and lifestyles, though our bond as daughters strengthened. After many summers (by which the years of our lives are marked, mainly because school is boring and summer is not) we grew up into separate girls, though it seemed together, we were one whole person.

You see, I am the athlete. I am daring and bold and can run for miles. Nothing will stop me. Unfortunately, this has gotten me into trouble a few times. Luckily we have Lena. She is cautious, caring, and deep. She sees and understands things no one else does. She sympathizes and nurtures us when neccessary. Carmen is sassy and passionate. She does as she feels, for example, if she is angry, she'll do something about it. Tibby is rebellious and tentative. It takes a while for her to register things, though her grades don't suck, if you get what I mean.

After a year apart in 4 completely different environments, we've changed. Carmen went up to Boston with her beau, Win. Tibby went to New York to study filmmaking. Lena and I went to Rhode Island. Her to Rhode Island School of Design (RISD) to paint, and I went to Brown to continue my soccer career.

We all come home at separate times, except for Lena and me, but we'll be meeting the others when we do. Thanks to a rule established during spring break, we will not be officially kicking off our summer as custom dictates. It doesn't feel right to have our ceremony smelling like other people, not to mention us having really bad travel hair. However, what makes this summer different from those past, we're all staying home this summer.


	2. Chapter 1

After hours in the heat traveling in a car that has a tendency to overheat, the arctic temperatures consuming her body causing goose bumps on her dark skin were a God-send. Carmen dropped her bag and stretched out her arms in a dramatic fashion.  
As if the joyous cries from her mouth didn't express her relief. She was home. It took no time to register that this was a different home, though that was to be expected. Carmen was too tired to notice the difference and crashed on the furniture that was a couch by day, bed by night. She closed her eyes and settled down to take a nice long coma. As luck would have it, her cell phone began to vibrate and emit the latest top 40 hit. She snapped up and flipped open her thin, pink rectangle of a phone.

"BEE!" she squealed.

"CARMA!"

"Lena's?"

"In 20 minutes."

"I'll be right there."

Forty-five minutes later, Carmen pulled up in the Kaligaris' driveway. Bee clamored into the car before it had completely stopped. She had been there tapping her toe impatiently before Carmen's arrival. She squealed and flung open the door. She jumped in and flung her arms around Carmen. The car jerked as Carmen's foot slid around on the brake due to the spare blonde hanging around her neck.

After the car came to a full stop, Lena crept into the backseat. After about 5 minutes of more squeals and hugs, Carmen backed out of the drive-way and continued on.

"God, I'm glad I called you when I did, or we would have stranded poor Tibby at the train station."

Carmen smirked, "Well, it's a good thing Lena texted me Tibby's arrival time so I knew I would have time to make myself not smell."

Bridget looked back at Lena who had an innocent look plastered on her face.

"What?"

Bridget stuck her tongue out at Lena and laughed.

"So, Carma, how are you?" Lena asked this question with an unusual tenderness in her voice. Bridget looked at Carmen with troubled eyes, ones that she, herself, had seen so many times in her life. It surprised her that she was the one looking through them instead of being analyzed by them. Troubled turned to worry in Bridget's eyes as she saw a trace of pain flicker across Carmen's face. The worry spread across her own face as Carmen's hands slipped on the wheel slightly and Bridget was thrown against the door.

"Oh, God, Carma, I'm sorry. I didn't think..."

"No, no. Don't worry about it. I'm fine."

Lena knew the symptoms of pining and heartbreak more than anyone. She knew about the much needed denial. She figured denial would lead to acceptance, though it never did. Lena thought she knew about this better than anyone, but one look at Carmen's face convinced her that she was sure Carmen was living in the tragic kingdom.

It was strange, Carmen's break-up with Win. Details had been uncharacteristically withheld. She claimed it was just a normal break up. They weren't meant to be and things had just faded over time. She claimed she was fine a little too often for someone who was fine. Her friends could see through her lies and, furthermore, knew the cause had to be something tragic if it kept her quiet for the first time in her life.

The three girls sat in silence in the car. It was as if tiny dust clouds had hijacked the atmosphere and they couldn't speak or see each other. As they neared the station, the dust settled slightly, but the remaining particles hindered any conversation. It had seemed fortunate enough that Tibby's father had volunteered to bring back all but most of her stuff before her finals, allowing for the girls to scoop her up in theatrical fashion. As they awkwardly trudged into the station, Bridget was beginning to think this wasn't such a good idea. Absentmindedly lost in thought, she kept walking. Unable to multitask, Bridget tripped over Lena's large feet and smacked her arm on a trashcan on her way down. The fleeting moment of gracefulness temporarily cleared the air. Lena and Carmen helped hoist Bee to her feet and they continued to Tibby's platform.

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Tibby struggled with the heavy sack over her shoulder. She bounced on her toes in an uncharacteristic moment of eagerness. She couldn't wait to see her friends. Her knees jittered as the train slowly jolted to a stop. Unprepared for the rocky arrival, Tibby was thrown off balance and had to regain her step. She looked around and realized she wasn't the only unprepared one. The second the doors opened, she bolted from the car and sprinted down the platform. She saw a tall blonde girl ahead and slowed to a walk. She could recognize that hair anywhere. It took a second for the crowd to disperse slightly before they saw her. In the blink of an eye, three girls ran and unabashedly crashed into Tibby. Ignoring the stares and mocking comments, the four girls squealed and hugged in Bridget picked up Tibby's bag and started for the car, "C'mon, let's go!" she called.

Tibby looked at her friends suspiciously, "Where are we going?"

Carmen looked at Tibby coyly, "Oh, you'll see."

Tibby avoided Carmen's eyes, "Oh. Great."

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With the return of people to the car, the dust was stirred again. Silence was among the girls. So much had happened that year, many things unspoken. Many things that had to be shared, but were probably best not to share. For the first time in years, all four girls were here to stay for the summer, even Bridget. She was only leaving for 3 separate weeks to coach the summer camp at Brown, a college soccer custom. It was up to the months of summer to clean the dust out of the air, perhaps with the assistance of the Traveling Pants.


	3. Chapter 2

Carmen woke up. Last night had been fun, something she hadn't experienced in a while. She was glad to see that they had broken into Rockwood pool, just like they had last summer. Looking back on the night before, Carmen felt it had been a symbolic cleansing--washing themselves clean of the baggage that lay between them all.

She got up and went into the bathroom. No one was home. Her mother was at work. David was at work. They conveniently carpooled, because they worked at the same place. How pathetic would it be if they took separate cars. Carmen snorted at this ridiculousness. Her mind continuing to travel. She was appreciative of the fact that they dropped Ryan off at day care allowing her to sleep.

Snapping back to attention, Carmen glanced into the mirror. She wasn't quite sure what she saw. She sighed. It had been ninety-two days, twelve hours, and...Carmen glanced at the clock...forty-two minutes since things had abruptly ended between her and Win. Her face was the emotional equivalent to that town in Mulan after the Huns had raided it. While she didn't want to think about the period of time during which she was happily dating Win, she couldn't help it. It haunted her dreams and thoughts. It wasn't right, what he did, yet, she felt helpless in terms of the situation. She knew it was serious, she knew she should open up. There were consequences for what he did.

Abruptly she shook her head. No, she couldn't do that to him. Take away his whole life over a silly thing like that? It wouldn't be fair. It occurred to her, way back in her brain, that it was so typical for her to feel this way. To defend him. She certainly didn't feel at fault, but legal revenge would make her feel that way.

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Voices could be heard in the alleyway. They were comfortable and joyous. They were ceremonial and serious. The crumpling of bags could be heard. A plastic container, full, no doubt, could be heard smacking the age-worn floor, accompanied by the shrieks of four teenage girls.

Bee screamed in hysterics. Tibby was rolling on the floor in laughter. Lena looked had grabbed the Pants and bolted to the other side of the room. Carmen looked horrified.

While setting up for the ceremony, a bottle of Odwalla had fallen from Tibby's grace when Bridget had grabbed the bag of sour Gummi Worms from the massive pile in Tibby's arms. So as the bottle smacked the wooden floor, the cap popped off and became a red fountain of fruit punch, or as Carmen liked to call it, frunch, juice spouting everywhere. Miraculously, the Pants had narrowly escaped the debacle.

Carmen sat there horrified. Couldn't her friends see how quickly the Pants had come to destruction? The sacred center of their universe had almost been destroyed. The single thing that had kept them united during times of separation. And now, here they were, the three of them, cracking up. It was irresponsible. It was the Bay of Pants affair.

"How can you guys just sit there laughing about this?" she yelled. Carmen was never one for self-restraint.

"Carmen. It's no big deal. The Pants are fine. No use crying over spilled juice." Bridget coaxed.

"You mean fountainous juice." Tibby quirked.

Carmen was irritated. "Don't you see how close they came to destruction? They're frayed at the edges, the seams are coming out. How can you be fine with the thought that a bottle of Odwalla almost destroyed the single artifact we pay homage to? It's horrifying to think about, yet here you are! Just cracking up!"

"Car..." Lena put her hand on Carmen's arm. "We're aware of the importance of the Pants. We know how scary it is to think of what could have happened, but it's okay now. They're fine"

Carmen looked at Lena and then at the Pants. Lena was right. Carmen clutched the Pants in her hands. She examined the fabric and drew it close to her face. The familiar smell calmed her. There was something about the magic of the Pants that allowed them to keep the same smell. You would never guess through the olfactory senses that these Pants lived in a closet for most of the year and had never been washed. She sat there admiring the Pants and laid them in the center of the circle.

She was about to begin her speech when she noticed the embroidery she had made the summer before. About meeting Win. How naive she had been. So full of joy. As she stared at the careful stitches, she felt her breath catch in her throat. She felt herself getting up. She felt herself bolting from the room. She felt herself racing down the stairs and out of Gilda's and into the street.

Bridget, Tibby, and Lena sat there dumbstruck, unaware of what had just happened. The three of them got up and chased after Carmen. While Lena was the first out the door, Bee was the first out of the building. Tibby was halfway out the door when she realized that they may need the Pants, unaware of the cosmic disturbance in Carmen's head. She grabbed them and took off after Bridget and Lena.

Bridget and Lena had found Carmen bawling on a picnic table at a park around the corner. Tibby let the pants fall to the ground and joined her friends. There they sat, huddled together in loving silence. They were there to let Carmen know that she wasn't alone, despite all her troubles and random insecurities. They wanted her to know that she would never be alone, Pants or no. Physical presence or no. The seconds ticked. The minutes passed. As Carmen's tears subsided, roaring sirens filled the air.

Emergency vehicles began to crowd the streets. The air was filled with piercing cries. Fire trucks, ambulances, police cars rushed to the area. The girls stood and watched. It took a second for it to hit, but then they realized where the vehicles were headed. Their hearts dropped as they looked on in horror. They sprinted around the corner.

A ghastly sight exposed itself and horror manifested itself in the stomachs of the four girls. Flames towered over them. The brilliant shades of orange danced in the wind as if they were listening to the tunes of Paula Abdul. They rejoiced as if devouring cookie dough, no longer raw, sour Gummi Worms, strawberry Pop-Tarts, and oddly shaped, hard cheese puffs. These flames were united in their common goal of destruction.

The four girls stood and watched these flames. They watched them take on their own destructors. The flames went down together, but not after a good long fight. Unfortunately, they took Gilda's down with them.


	4. Chapter 3

Bridget woke up with three girls on top of her. Well, kind of. Tibby was clutching Bridget's right leg. Carmen was using Bridget's butt for a pillow. Lena had her feet propped up on Bridget's upper back. Bee had no choice but to lay there, soaking in the closeness of her friends.

She was thinking about Eric. He had graduated last weekend. It had been a beautiful ceremony. Tears had welled in her eyes when he received his diploma. He was spending the summer playing for the Rochester Raging Rhinos. They were arguably the best team in the United Soccer League's first division. USL's first division was the highest level of amateur soccer in the country, formerly known as the A-League, it had been the stepping stone to MLS for many players, including Chris Rolfe of the Chicago Fire. She couldn't wait until he played closer to Bethesda so she could go to his game.

It was weird, to have him gone for the whole summer. They hadn't spent time together during the school year, and it had been a while since they had seen each other prior to his graduation. After the stretch of summer, he would be looking for a job in Rhode Island. He would move there and they might even live together. Things were going well for them, and Bridget was genuinely happy.

Moisture on Bridget's leg caused her to snap out of her reverie. Tibby had pulled Bridget's leg closer to her body and was somehow drooling on it. Bridget shook her leg.

"I think not, missy!"

Tibby stirred. "Huh?" She looked at the wet spot where her mouth had been while clutching Bee's leg. Feeling a little ridiculous, she sought to clear it from memory as quick as possible. She picked up her forgotten pillow and threw it at Bridget's head with a sheepish grin on her face.

Unfortunately, Lena had sat up at this time, so as Bridget blocked the pillow, it dumbly changed direction, hitting Lena square in the face. Lena screamed and woke Carmen up. The girls continued their full-fledged pillow fight. Squeals filled the air. However, the shattering of glass caused the girls to stop abruptly. As the enclosure around the scented wax had separated into shards, too fragile to stand up to the beating, the liquid behind Lena's eyes separated into tears.

Lena crumpled to the ground crying, fragile from the preceding events. She cried for her, she cried for Gilda's, she cried for the Sisterhood. As unstated as it was, there was little ease between the girls. Not the kind of ease that allows for dishing and telling. The things that had happened apart had been like Little Boy on Hiroshima, disintegrating their tangled web of comfort and obligation. She would be completely stressed except that in her heart, Lena knew that cities could be rebuilt.

One of the things that Lena could not say was the cause of the fire. She believed they all knew the cause, so, ironically, their silence brought them together, in the light of disaster. However, it was like reconstructing new buildings on top of wreckage. It was fruitless, and it wouldn't last. She knew the wreckage had to be cleared before things could be back to normal. She decided to clear some of that wreckage. She ceased her crying.

"So, did I ever tell you guys about what happened with Paul?"

Carmen was looking at Lena. She knew what caused and stopped the tears. She knew her Lenny. What was weird was that she didn't have an answer to that last question. How out of it was she to not know about her own step-brother and practically sister? How self-centered had she been to not absorb the information or to read between the lines and figure it out for herself? She had been so wrapped up in Win, their demise kind of made more sense now. She was blinded. She saw nothing but him and his goodness. It was why she never picked up on the clues or saw the truth in his face. She ignored it because she only allowed herself to see the good. She was afraid of the bad. _What's even worse_, Carmen thought, _Is that I'm not even asking the answer to the question. I'm sitting here thinking about myself and my problems. What is wrong with me?_

Bee beat her to the punch and replied with the simple one-worded answer. Lena explained that while she certainly loved Paul, she could not be in love with him. They were too much of the same thing, and it wasn't a stimulating relationship. To her friends, this made sense. The thing that made Lena and Paul work was the thing that made them not work. They were the same person. They, of all people, knew about long lasting relationships. All four girls were very different and provided the others with her unique qualities. They pushed and pulled and gave to each other. In fact, that was what the Pants were all about. This made sense. In fact this is what led Lena to her fully thought out decision. The major thing that Lena intentionally left out was that she had spent too much time comparing Paul to Kostos. It was horrible poison. Dangerous arsenic in small doses. It was what led Lena to realizing this nasty little fact quicker than later. It slowly began to seep into her thoughts. It caused her to analyze every conversation, act, and moment between them. Kostos had pushed her out of her comfort zone. Paul kept people grounded. Lena kept people grounded. There was 100 comfort all the time, which was boring. This is what she decided. Lucky for her guilt, she allowed herself to feel like she was doing someone a favor. She didn't need Paul. Some girl who needs some grounding, well, besides Carmen, needs Paul.

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Bridget was at home, putting things away, getting settled for the summer. For some reason, she had enlisted the help of Tibby, which was strange and rather pathetic since the two of them were probably the messiest and least organized half of their quad. In actuality, Tibby had just come over to deliver the Pants. Bee has never had them first, so the girls had decided over the phone that they should start with her. Tibby had picked them up in the park on her way home after the horrible realization that they were still there after the previous night's chaos.

Tibby was sitting on top Bridget's desk as she watched Bee dump all her clothes onto the floor. This made Tibby smile in appreciation since she had done the same thing when she had gotten home two days ago.

"So, what's Brian up to this summer?" Bridget asked this. She realized how ridiculous it was that she didn't already know this piece of information.

"He's interning in Japan. I have no idea when I'll see him next." Tibby's thoughts about this were indecipherable. One would think she would be upset about this information, but Tibby looked kind of relieved. She did look tired. She was bored of their relationship. She had instantaneously understood what Lena had said about her weakened relationship with Paul. If everything is okay and comfortable, there is no excitement, there is no stimulation. It's boring, leaving you to end things or find your own excitement. Even if it meant taking a train every other weekend to find it.

Bridget was not looking at her and did not recognize much of this in her voice. "That must suck."

Tibby was taken aback by Bridget's response. She had been expecting her to be curious at least. She had not picked up on a single thing. Tibby was dying here. She had to dish. She had picked Bridget for a reason. She needed to come clean and knew that Bridget would not be overwhelming like Lena would. Tibby couldn't come clean to Carmen because she would wring Tibby's neck.

"Bee. I've gotta tell you something."

Bridget looked up and noted the seriousness and guilt in Tibby's voice. She braced herself for disaster, knowing this was not going to be good. It was like that moment where you see a car coming and a person walking in its path unknowingly. You knew a disaster was going to come. You knew it was going to be messy. You knew a lot of lives were going to be screwed up as a result. Yet, there was no stopping it, and the very second that metal and flesh touch, you want to vomit in horror, fear, and disbelief.

"What is it?"

"I know why Carmen and Win broke up."

Bridget looked relieved. "Why?"

"Because of me."

And there it was. Bridget sat down on her bed staring at Tibby in disbelief. It certainly would be messy. It looked like the damage would be irreparable. She put her head in her hands and looked up at Tibby.

Tibby could feel Bridget's eyes burning into her brain. Bridget wanted details, but then she didn't. Tibby was so ashamed of herself, but was so invigorated by getting this large monkey off of her back. She watched Bridget get up and leave the room.


	5. Chapter 4

Bridget walked back into the room. She sat down. She was completely stunned. She could not believe what Tibby had just told her, for, well, a lot of reasons. One, it was completely uncharacteristic of her...in every way. Cheating on Brian? That is just awful. She never knew her friend could do such a horrible thing. Tibby is one of the sweetest, caring girls. To mislead and treat Brian like that was wrong and so not Tibby. Second of all, it was a **SERIOUS** breach of friendship. To cheat on Brian was one thing, but with Win, Carmen's boyfriend?

"God, were you on drugs or something?" was the first thing out of Bridget's mouth. Bee stood up. She sat down. She didn't know what to do.

Tibby was sitting in the corner like a guilty toddler. She knew what she did was wrong. She knew apologies wouldn't be enough. She knew the damage was irreparable. She looked up as Bridget began to speak again.

Bridget began to think out loud. "You know, this explains Carmen's behavior. Why she's so distant and moody."

"Well, no, not really, you haven't heard the half of it. If she knew about this, I wouldn't be alive." Tibby responded.

Bridget shot Tibby a dirty look. Tibby cringed, sighed, and began to tell Bridget the rest of the story. Everything that had happened from Win's cover up to Win's method of forcing Carmen to sever ties with him.

Bridget screamed in horror. She couldn't even look at Tibby.

"It's not like I asked him to do that! I had NO idea that he was going to do that! If I knew, I would have come clean myself. It was probably the worst thing he could have done. No, not probably, it _was_ the worst thing he could have done!" Tibby started to cry. "If I had known, I would have just severed ties with him myself. I would have told Carmen. I never wanted that to happen. Bee, you have to believe me!"

Bridget sat there stunned. "You need to leave."

Tibby looked at Bee. Her cheeks were tear stained. Remorse was written all over her face. "Bee, please..."

Bridget was crying herself. "Now."

Tibby looked at Bridget and left the room. On her way out she heard Bridget's voice ring out after her.

"Don't tell Lena."

Tibby marched back into Bridget's doorway. "Bridg, I gotta. It's the only way things can get better." And with that, Tibby left.

Bridget looked to the phone. She had to call Carmen. Carmen's behavior really, really made sense now. She got the sense from Tibby that she wants to 'fess up to Carmen on her own, which she was going to do, but Carmen needs some major TLC. So Bridget picked up the phone and called Carmen.

"What's up, Bee?"

"Hey, can I come over?" Carmen could detect a waver in Bridget's voice. It was filled with delicacy and care. It was kind of like talking to Lena these days. She inwardly groaned. The last thing she needed was reminding of the incident every time she spoke to each of her friends

"Yeah, knock your socks off."

Tibby was wandering through the streets absent-mindedly. She had no idea where she was. She didn't particularly care. The world was dead to her. She was dead to herself. She continued to traipse around until she heard a voice from above.

"Hey! Tibby! Wait up!"

So...she was outside Lena's house.

Lena rushed downstairs and ran outside to meet Tibby. She couldn't properly see Tibby from the second floor of her house, but as she neared Tibby slowed down. She was drinking in Tibby's appearance. Her hair was greasy. Her clothes were the same from the night before and smelled of ash. Her entire figure was slumped towards the ground. Lena looked at Tibby's face and saw the horror in her eyes, and a yearning in her face to dish. Lena braced herself.

"I cheated on Brian."

Lena's face was struggling. She didn't want to make Tibby feel worse than she looked, full of remorse and guilt, but she wasn't exactly going to do a cartwheel in encouragement either. Before Lena could reply, Tibby continued.

"There's more."

Tibby had been avoiding Lena's face. It would reveal too much. It was unfortunate because Lena was giving her a "I don't want or need to know more" look.

"Oh?" Lena managed to croak.

"Yeah. Um. The person I cheated with. He was, um, kind of going out with a certain person we know." This last sentence was subject to Tibby's nerves and resulted in her sounding like Krista, the uptalker. Tibby braced herself. She knew Lena was going to try and keep her composure so as not to overwhelm Tibby, but that's not what she needed from her. She needed Lena to blow up at her, the least likely to do so, and really punish her.

Lena's eyes popped out of her head. Her mind was going a million miles an hour just trying to process this simple sentence. She knew exactly who Tibby meant. Poor Carmen!

Tibby finally looked at Lena's face. It told her everything she already knew. Which would explain everything that Lena saw on Tibby's face. She saw the stress, the pain. She mostly saw remorse and regret. She also saw Tibby's lips moving.

"And I'm also kind of pregnant."

This was too much for Lena to take. "WHAT?"

Tibby grinned. "Well, no. I'm not."

"Tibby! Why on earth would you tell me that?" Lena screeched.

"Well, it doesn't seem as awful now. Does it?"

"Not for that, but the heart attack I just had kind of makes up for it!"

Tibby continued on. She told Lena what Win had done so as to force Carmen to sever ties with him. That was when Lena really lost it. She started crying for Carmen, but started wailing on Tibby. It was completely uncharacteristic of her. Something had definitely occurred and it was slowly bringing the girls out of their elements in succession.

Lena was so very much out of her element that Effie, Lena's little sister, was forced to stick her head out of the window in curiosity. Effie's eyes bugged out. She had never, ever heard Lena shriek like that. In her hand she had a phone set. She brought it up to her ear.

"Uh, Carmen. I think I found her, but she's kind of screaming at Tibby right now. I'll have her call you back."

Carmen sat there very confused. It explained why she hadn't been able to get a hold of Tibby. But what on Earth would cause Lena to scream at Tibby? It was very bizarre. So she sat there until Bridget came over. She would have answers.


	6. Chapter 5

Bridget burst into Carmen's apartment.

"Carma?"

Carmen came into the living room.

"Hey. Do you know what's up with Tibby and Lena? I tried calling Tibby, but she didn't answer. And then when I called Lena, Effie said she was outside shrieking at Tibby."

Bridget looked uncomfortable. She didn't know what to say. It's not like she could tell Carmen. That was Tibby's job, and to comfort Carmen straight out would just be too obvious. She didn't want to flat out be honest with Carmen, that Tibby did a bad thing and it was up to her to tell her. Yes, she was known for her blunt truths, but this wasn't the time. On the contrary, she couldn't lie to Carmen, not after all of this. What was she to do?

"I think you need to ask Tibby."

Bridget could see that Carmen's suspicions were aroused, but not so much to the point where she would question Bridget or think that she was lying. Carmen accepted this. Then sat next to Bee on the couch. Bee put her arm around Carmen comfortingly. Carmen put her head on Bee's shoulder.

Carmen could sense that something bad was about to happen. She knew it. She could tell by the look on Bee's face and her scarcity of words. She could tell by the way that she felt very comforted by Bee. She could feel the love and the sympathy. It was like having other people know that you had a life threatening disease before you did. They cast you sympathetic eyes and you didn't quite know why. Carmen, overwhelmed by emotion, began to cry. She could feel Bee's hand move the hair out of her face and so she buried her face further into Bridget's shoulder. She could feel the fabric of Bridget's top against her face. Her cheeks stung from the tears and fabric rubbing against her soft skin. Her eyes stung from overuse. Her nose was quickly turning on her. She could feel each tear leaving her eye. Each one a representation of a very confusing feeling. Fear. Sadness. Frustration. Confusion. Anger. She felt a very soft quilted fabric rub against her hand. Bee was handing her a tissue. She blew her nose and rested her head in Bridget's lap.

"Bee, than--"

"Shh, don't mention it."

Lena was sitting on the ground indian-style across from Tibby, staring at her. She didn't know what to do. She felt helpless. She was envious that Tibby had the tree was a backrest. But that was beside the point.

"So what are we supposed to do now?"

Tibby shrugged. "I've been trying to figure that out."

Lena stood up. "I'm going to go call Carmen. Then I'm going over there. You might want to think about doing the same thing."

Tibby watched Lena walk inside. She got up and shook the dirt off her pants. It was a hot day. Why she was wearing black pants was beyond her comprehension. She could feel the sun heating the metal in her nose ring. She was burning up on the inside with guilt and on the outside. She looked up and wondered if Bailey was somehow punishing her. Tibby mused, clearly Bailey would be in cahoots with the Big Guy. She was in cahoots with everyone who was worthy in her eyes. It had been cool outside when she got dressed this morning, but now, after this very trying day, it was scorching. The sun was beating down on her, almost as a form of punishment. Her nose ring burned. Her body was getting hotter. She trudged down the sidewalk feeling the burden of her mistakes.

Bridget and Carmen were watching Carmen's soap on the couch when Lena arrived. Lena sat down on the other side of Carmen.

Carmen looked up. "Where's Tibby?"

Lena avoided Carmen's eyes. "Ehh...I don't know."

Carmen was searching her. "Why were you yelling at her earlier? What did she do? Punch another hole in her head?"

"I wish." Lena muttered.

The air was thick again. The dust was back. This time it was very concentrated and it swirled around their heads as they watched The _Brawn and the Beauty_. There were no remarks. No comments. No questions. Only the laments of Ryan Hennessey filled the apartment. Suddenly a noise erupted like a cannon and all three girls jumped.

It was Bridget's cellphone. She answered it.

"Hello?"

Lena and Carmen were staring at Bee curiously. Their curiosity turned into concern as they saw Bridget's face become very troubled. Bridget hung up.

"What's wrong."

"I..uh.." Bridget stood up looking around. "Where are my shoes?"

"Bee, what's wrong?" Lena asked.

"My...Greta's sick and not doing well. I need to find my shoes."

Lena sat Bee down. "You wore flip flops. And they're on your feet."

Bee got up and pulled Lena into the kitchen, out of Carmen's earshot.

"Don't tell Tibby. I don't want her sympathy. I don't want her feeling bad for me." Bridget stormed out of the kitchen and downstairs. She yelled, "I'm going to Alabama!" And slammed the door behind her.

Lena looked at Carmen.

"I think we should call Tibby."


	7. Chapter 6

Tibby flipped her cell phone open. Not because she wanted to talk to anyone, but because she wanted the mocking tones of her ring tone emitting the melodies of The Faders to stop. _Better Off Dead, indeed_ Tibby mused.

"Tibby?"

"Lena?"

"Can you come over to Carmen's?"

Tibby winced. She didn't want to, but knew it had to be done. She sighed. "I'll be there soon."

She hung up and turned around towards Carmen's, hearing the hollowness of her Doc Martens against the loose gravel.

It seemed like it took no time to get to Carmen's and walked right in. She avoided Lena's stares and sat on the floor, facing Carmen and Lena. She felt like crap. No need to even attempt to put herself on the same level as them. The floor it was.

Lena stared at Tibby. "So. Tibby. Anything interesting to share?"

Tibby looked at Lena. "Could I talk to Carmen? Alone?"

Lena nodded and went into the nursery and shut the door.

Carmen winced. "So. Hot day."

"You have no idea," Tibby said. "Carmen I have something to tell you."

Carmen braced herself and spoke slowly, "What is it?"

"I cheated on Brian."

Carmen sighed. This isn't so bad, she thought.

"There's more."

_Oh_.

"See, I kind of cheated with someone. A boy type someone. A someone we both know."

Carmen looked at her searchingly. Who...? Oh. Oh God. Oh no.

"With..." Tibby showed a lot of struggle in her demeanor. Her palms were sweaty, her brows furrowed. She swallowed and took a deep breath. "With Win."

Carmen sat there and stared at Tibby. Her hands were hanging by her sides and for some reason, there was fresh air in her mouth. Oh. It was hanging open. Right. She found speaking very difficult right now.

"There's more."

"More?" Carmen finally choked out.

"Yes. But if I had known the more was going to happen, I..I..I wouldn't have let it. You have to know that before I continue. I did not advocate it. I did not encourage it. It was all the doing of Win. Not me."

Carmen knew what she was talking about. She knew precisely what Tibby meant now. She felt her head hit the back of the couch. She had lost the strength to sit up.

"Y-y-y mean that the torture and hell that I have been living with for the past 3 months was because of YOU? Because of your betrayal, not only to Brian, but to me? After almost 19 years of friendship? You mean every weekend when he was busy studying, he was with you?"

"Yes."

"You mean that every night for the past three months where I've woken up in the middle of the night after being haunted by the heinous act that this imbecile committed was because of your betrayal?"

"Yes."

"The fact that I can't stand to have even my mother touch my arm. The fact that I can barely sleep. The fact that I've suffered the biggest, most indescribable pain, was because of you?"

"Yes." Tibby looked down. "It's not like I wanted it! It's not like I asked him! He was tired of running around. He decided to do something so that you would break up with him! I thought he was going to do something like call you a horrible name or something. I never thought he would commit a felony and a crime against mankind! I wanted to kill him when he told me when he told me of how he violated you. How he did the worst possible thing a man could do to a woman! I don't even remember what I did to him, but it was bad. I wanted to seek all the revenge I could on him, to make up for it! But we all know that it's impossible. I know you've been haunted. I know you've been traumatized physically, mentally, and emotionally! I know you never want to speak to me again. But that's what happened, and why. I wanted to you to know."

Tibby stood there.

Carmen looked at Tibby with incredible scorn. She was struggling inside. She wanted to be mature about it. To keep this friendship intact. She knew Tibby's remorse was genuine. She knew she should do the grown-up thing, but she had grown up so many ways because she had met Win. She tried to cast aside her immaturity to grow. Part of her wanted to rebel against the fact that he had somehow changed her for the better at one point. She loved Tibby. There was no way, no matter what, that she could cast her off.

Carmen went over to Tibby and took Tibby's hands in her own. "I don't hate you. I want you to know that. I'm super pissed. I'm super hurt, and I don't really want to look at your right now."

Tibby squeezed Carmen's hands and looked into her face. She looked genuine. "Carmen. I am so sorry." Tears formed behind her eyes like budding pop stars, and burst onto the scene.

Carmen looked at Tibby. "I accept your apology. But, I want you to leave. I need some time to mull over this. Call me in a week or two?"

Tibby nodded and turned to go.

Carmen pulled Tibby back and gave her a hug. She watched Tibby leave.

Lena came back out into the living room, looking around. "Where'd you put her body?"

Carmen smirked at Lena, very teary eyed, "I actually did the mature thing for once."

Lena looked at Carmen like she had six heads. "You throw a fit when no one pays attention to you. When your father meets a woman. When your mother meets a guy. When you have an incoming sibling. You kick. You scream. You throw rocks. You ruin lives and windows. But when your best friend in the whole world cheats on her boyfriend with your boyfriend and causes the worst possible thing to happen to you, you do the mature thing. Even after a lifetime of friendship, you still continue to amaze me."

Carmen looked earnestly at Lena. "I know."

Bridget was throwing things into her duffle bag left and right. This top? That one? Sure, why not? She packed everything she needed and more. She was running around her house like a mad woman. The next flight left in a few hours, and she needed to be on it.

Tibby came in and knocked on the door frame. "Hey."

"What do you want?" Bridget asked coldly.

"I told Carmen. I think it's actually going to be okay."

Bridget looked at her. "You're delusional. Wait. How are you even still living?"

"I was very undeservedly forgiven."

Bridget stared. "You realize that Carmen and Lena are completely different right? You didn't get them mixed up. Did you?"

"No." Tibby looked around. "Where are you going?"

"Greta's sick. I'm going to Burgess in a few hours. Now leave, I've got a lot of packing to do."

Tibby looked at Bridget, who had a very hard expression on her face. "I'm sor--"

"I don't want your sympathy. Just go."

Tibby sighed and left.

Bridget triple checked her stuff and called a cab. She was nearly out of her bed room door when she realized she forgot the Pants. Despite all that had happened, she still believed in them. She traded her jeans for the preferred pair and went downstairs to wait for the cab.


	8. Chapter 7

"Seriously?"

Tibby was sitting on a large rock outside Bridget's house. The very rock Bridget was hoping to sit on while waiting for her cab. So now not only was her seat taken, but the last person she wanted to deal with right now was sitting on it.

She loved Tibby, she did. Somewhere deep inside Bridget forgave Tibby for all the horrible things, but she was a wreck. She was worried about Greta. She was worried about Carmen. She wanted to give her strength to them because they needed it. She did not want to waste it dealing with the lengthy healing process that was to occur.

"Tibs. I told you to leave. My cab is on its way. I just want to collect my thoughts. I don't want to say something stupid."

Tibby stared at Bridget. She was struggling to string together the proper union of words.

"I can't let you leave mad at me. Not this mad. What about our rule? Huh?"

"I think that went out the window with the 'Don't cheat with your friend's boyfriend' rule."

Her words were nasty, and they stung, hard. Tibby winced. She took the abuse silently. It's not like she had any defense. It was true and she deserved what she got. It was times like this when she thought of all the people she let down. She braced herself for more abuse, but it didn't come. Bridget was looking at her with an odd expression on her face.

Bridget chewed on her lip a bit. She had looked at Tibby. Her skin was magically pasty pale, even in the scorching sun. Her eyes were of a bloodshot type. The skin under her eyes was blue. She looked awful. She had paid for her actions in every way possible, even in a few that hadn't been invented yet. She was being strong, despite her weak moment. She knew she was willing to transfer all of her strength to Bridget. Not out of guilt, but out of love. She wanted things to be okay for Bridget.

Bridget pulled Tibby off the rock. She laughed at the alarmed look on Tibby's face and grasped her hand. She squeezed it. Tibby squeezed back. Bee looked up. Tibby looked up. Their mismatched expressions uniquely conveyed an understanding. Tibby knew what she did wrong. Bridget was still hurt. But together, they could forgive and grow. They hugged and stood there for a long time embracing. In that hug they stood as one pillar, uniquely supporting a large weight. Even when the pillar split, the strength from one side was given to the other, out of love.

A yellow taxi cab pulled up to the curb. The trunk was opened and Bridget put her bag in there. Tibby looked into Bridget's eyes. They were an intense blue, but a little watery. She knew things were going to be okay.

Bridget slapped a kiss on Tibby's cheek and got in the car. She buckled her seatbelt and sank into the leather. It was hot and burned her legs.

"Airport, please."

And so the driver took his foot from the brake and gently accelerated onto the motorway.

Tibby was sitting in the middle of the street now and resembled a fallen pillar. She no longer had strength, she had given it to Bee. She cried as she watched Bridget's cab drive farther and farther away.

Carmen woke up with Lena's foot in her face. She turned over to free herself of the vast footness. She thought about Win. She thought about Tibby. She thought about them together. She let out a sound of disturbance.

Lena shifted in her sleep and sat up.

"What's wrong?"

Carmen put her head in her hands. "I don't think I can do it, Len."

"Do what?"

"Forgive. Forget. Be a big person."

Lena sighed. She knew this battle. It was difficult. "I know it's not easy Carma, and I'm not going to tell you what to do because you know what to do."

Carmen looked at Lena, "What made you forgive Kostos?"

"Sometimes, you can't help but forgive the people you love, no matter how foolish they are or how much they've hurt you."

Carmen opened her mouth to speak, but astoundingly, found no words. She gaped like a fish at Lena. She processed what Lena had said. Carmen knew Lenny was right.

It was as if Lena had read her mind. "Besides, who better to help you heal your wounded heart?"

Carmen sheepishly grinned and pointed at Lena.

Lena gave her a look and shook her head.

Carmen nodded and sighed. It wouldn't be easy, but maybe this love thing ran deeper than she knew. She was struggling to accept and understand it. She was struggling to find it in her heart to forgive Tibby. It was like Carmen was drowning in her despair, and the only thing to help was oxygen. She kicked and she kicked, but could only feel her thighs burn. No matter how hard she tried to push through to the top, the weight tied to her foot dragged her down.

Still. She was nothing if not determined.

She needed some flippers, and a helping hand.


	9. Chapter 8

Bridget was standing up. She had a bulging backpack weighing her down. Which was a good thing, she figured, since she might float away without it. She slumped a little under its weight and tilted slightly when she picked up her duffle bag. She exhaled. The warm air made her moist, sticky bangs fly slightly from her forehead.

She took a step forward on to the wooden step. It creaked slightly under her weight. It was a declaration of its fatigue and age. Bridget removed her foot. There was an immense struggle going on within her head. She remembered the Pants, (how queer it was for Bridget, of all people, to have to extract courage from the Pants to help her keep moving), and stepped up again. The old wood creaked once more, but this time Bridget ignored it. She shifted her weight forward on her foot and ascended to the porch. She felt a strain in the front of her thigh as she beared the weight of her baggage. She crossed the porch, ignoring the loud protests from the floorboards. She flung open the screen door and entered the house, dropping her bags in the foyer. The house shook. Things rattled. More old fatigued brittle things Bridget had never noticed before. She heard a voice from upstairs. Her heart raced and her mind flashed all sorts of colors. It hit. A man voice. A doctor voice.

"Excellent timing. I was just about to leave. You must be Bridget." The doctor voice came from an elder man dressed in a day suit that must have been traded with the town bum decades ago. He smelled old. Not like old people, but musty. It was similar to how her gym suit smelled if she waited too long before she brought it home. His sleeved frayed at the cuffs. The elbows were quite worn, but not yet patched. He had graying hair that must have been in a set with his mustache. He had strolled into the room, closely followed by Bee's taciturn Uncle Pervis.

Bridget looked around. She was confused and slightly frightened. She had no idea who this man was or what connection he had to the family. "Who are you? Why is my timing perfect?"

The man chuckled. He was an overbearing kind of fellow with a hint of condescension. "I'm the town doctor, though I'm actually new to the area. I was just checking on your grandmother. She was delighted to hear that you were coming. I was about to leave, but you got just as."

Bridget stared at the man. She couldn't help but note that if she had finished her sentence the way he did, she would sound ridiculous, but with his southern dialect it worked in a bizarre way. As she was lost in thought the man had bid her goodbye and strolled out the door. Her Uncle Pervis left the room when the doctor did. Bridget had been dying to ask this man a vital question, but was afraid of the answer. She was relieved to see no one else around her. Standing alone in the foyer she mumbled the question to the stale dust.

"How is she?"

Tibby was in familiar territory. She was sitting in lush green grass in the twilight. She stared at the large marble stone in front of her and sighed. She rolled over onto her back, next to the grave, and looked up.

"How could I have let this happen?" Tibby asked. She didn't know why, but she expected an answer. Where had things gone wrong? She had always been majorly inexperienced girl, even compared to her friends. Bee was Bee, Carmen had been eye candy to so many, and well, we all knew Lena's story with Kostos. So with her inexperience, she didn't have expectations of Brian, nor any desire to pursue advanced physical acts with him because, frankly, the thought absolutely terrified her. Tibby had recognized that somewhere down the road, she didn't love Brian the way she thought, the way he loved her. The inability to have the capability of imagining herself with Brian romantically made her realize that while she loved him dearly, she could never see him in a romantic light. Earlier in the year, Tibby had brushed these feelings off as insecurities. She couldn't break up with him, she couldn't break him like that. It would ruin all that they had, and she couldn't accept that, so she avoided it.

How had Tibby ended up with Win, then? It had been a cold weekend in February, she mused. Carmen was restless and decided to take the train to visit Tibby in New York. She brought Win. The three of them had hung out at Tibby's favorite spots and in her dorm.

Carmen simply had ignored the spark between them, naiive with trust. After Carmen had gone to bed, Win joined Tibby on the couch.

Tibby squeezed her eyes shut when she thought of this moment.

She remembered how he had smelled. He was perfectly fragrant after his shower. Tibby remembered internally swooning as his side touched hers while they watched a re-run of Saturday Night Live. She had sat tensely, hardly laughing at one of Tina Fey's best jokes. She knew that Win had sensed her tension because he put his arm around her and slumped in his seat. A physical demonstration suggesting that she should relax. Tibby remembered how she pulled a blanket over them, on that chilly February night. She sank into his body and enjoyed how they shared body heat. After SNL had ended, they merely gazed out the window, watching the snow fall over the city. She remembered feeling her heart pumping briskly and electrons race through her brain. Tibby had always thought Bridget was crazy in her own right, but it was this moment that Tibby finally understood the pleasures of daring thrill.

Tibby looked up over her shoulder and Win was looking right back at her.

Tears were welling behind Tibby's eyes. Her dark brown ones had met his blue ones. Slower and slower they grew closer in proximity. Tibby's lips had trembled. Her face had been stamped with doubt and desire. Their noses touched and despite the solemn look upon Tibby's face, her eyes were darting back and forth behind her eyelids. She had flinched and recoiled. Win smiled, but stubbornly wrapped his arms around her and kissed her. Tibby remembered this was not a kiss driven by passion or love. It was not driven by guilt or deceit, as Tibby had certainly felt those things, but purely by total chemical lust. Tibby had been wracked with shame, but instantly forgot it as she tasted his lips, guiltily thrilled by the fact that Carmen was in the next room. She kissed Win back with more vigor than she had ever kissed Brian. They had kissed and kissed.

Tears resembled dew on the grass. Tibby remembered waking up the next morning curled in a blanket. Her clothes, previously strewn throughout the common room, were in a messy pile beneath the bed. She had gotten out of bed and gotten dressed. When she entered the common room, she sat opposite the cuddly couple on the floor. She had smiled slyly at Win, he smiled back at her. After that weekend, Win had come back three times a week for romantic trysts in the city.

Tibby looked over at the stone. She was ashamed of her ignorance. She had thought that she cared for Brian little and Win much simply due to chemistry. She was ashamed of using Bee's nature as an excuse to drive her. She was ashamed of taking advantage of her guilt to make things more intense. She was remorseful that she had let things get too intense. She was ashamed of the way she had been living her life. She wept tears of apology to Bailey, who may or may not have understood, for squandering her life, which was the worst thing she could have done.

Lena was on her way home from Carmen's. Her thoughts swirled around in her own mind. It was weird being home after such a long school year away. Though they had attempted to bridge the gap during the year and Bee _was_ nearby, the one person Lena was devoted to was, in fact, herself. She needed herself wholly for her basic needs of eating and hygiene. Not to mention the whole not flunking out of school thing. She depended only on herself to stay afloat. To study, to absorb, to draw.

Sure, Lena had friends at school, but she wasn't obligated to them -- she didn't feel the need to be there for them twenty-four seven like in her past or in her present. Lena was still adjusting from the shock of Gilda's torment to Tibby's confession. Lena felt that her purpose this summer was to make up for her behavior these past few months; to be honest, she kind of liked the ability to roll up into a cocoon of independence of her own. Now that she was out, she certainly didn't mind, for she loved her friends dearly the way that a beautiful butterfly loves to stretch its wings in the summer sun. She had to admit it, it was still a little weird.

It was scorching hot out and Lena was lost her in her thoughts. She wasn't commanding the ship as it steered its way into Washington D.C.. She was clearly a native because the circles of roads didn't mislead her in the slightest. In fact, despite her subconscious directing, she magically found herself a parking spot during the craziest of times, traffic-wise. She very soon found herself sitting on a bench, still in a trance-like state. The basic things didn't register in her brain. A bee on her eyelash would normally elicit a scream and an embarrassing "get it away from me" dance, but not now, not today. Lena had no idea why she came here, but she had felt compelled that it was the right thing to do. Her phone rang, but she dismissed it, in fact it was unlikely that she noticed it. Lena sat staring at steps of the Lincoln Memorial, well the steps, haunted by the ghost of her past. She could not love another, nor would she try again. It was grim for her to throw in the towel before the age of twenty, but she had done it. Lena's heart ached and she wept for herself. She wept for her friends who needed each other but would not search for a way, she wept for her waiting, hopeless self, and she wept for her sanity as a tall dark-haired Greek man floated toward her and gently spoke.

"Oh Lena."


	10. Chapter 9

"Oh my goodness! Kostos!"

She jumped into his arms. His broad shoulder muscles strained as he pulled her closer to his body. She pulled back to look at his face. They looked into each other's eyes and stared, exchanging a look of utmost passion. If exchanged looks could be rated by color, this one would be a smoldering, fiery crimson. Deep longing submerged in passion danced across their retinas like hot flames licking at empty space, search for oxygen to encourage its growth. Their faces moved closer together until their lips touched. She pulled away and there she stood, embraced in a kiss with a tall, dark skinned man. Only his locks were golden and his eyes were bright and expressive and, oh God, that nose...

Carmen sat up violently in a fit. Her breaths were frequent and heavy. Her mind was spinning around the room. Her body told her to lay back down, get some oxygen so it could adjust its blood pressure. Carmen ignored her body and sat there in thought. She was going to get up but her limbs were shaking so violently that she would probably collapse if she did, giving her body the victory, which she just couldn't allow.

This was it, she thought, she had lost it completely. She had totally flown off the handle. Lena and Win? This is what she got for eating tortilla chips with that new kind of salsa her mom bought, the really, really hot kind, right before bed. She knew Lena hadn't seen Kostos in almost two years, so she could totally dismiss the scenario of them uniting in front of the Lincoln Memorial. Or Lena with Win, for that matter. She silently cursed herself for prying details from Lena about that particular evening two summers ago. Now she was Miss Paranoia. And her with Win! Part of her wanted to laugh, another part of her wanted to throw up. The thought of them together was insanity, something Carmen was having an encounter with. The part of Carmen that wanted to throw up was narrated by a little voice in the back of her mind, that darn rational Carmen.

_Well, that was what you always thought with Tibby, wasn't it?_

Even the rational part of Carmen had gone on vacation to Looneyville. Carmen was concerned with herself, though something in the back of her mind was a little disappointed to discover that Looneyville wasn't a theme park with the Looney Tunes. She snorted a little, then realized what was going on inside of her head. She stood up, only to fall back onto the make-shift bed. She laid there for a minute. The room stopped spinning, her limbs relaxed, and she got up, taking deep breaths. This behavior lasted about thirty seconds as Carmen flew out of the door and onto the street below. She walked down the sidewalk running her fingertips through her hair and massaged her scalp. She remembered her pocket. It was lucky (or was it unlucky?) that she had fallen asleep with her cell phone in her pocket.

She pulled it out of her pocket and did speed dial for number two. She always did her speed dial in the order of their births, it was logical and orderly that way. She pressed the phone hard into her ear even though the tone was loud and it was quiet in suburbia on that summer weekday afternoon. She heard the tone ring and ring. It was like her brain was pinging with insanity each time. Her frustration grew each time, causing her to pace back and forth in a silent fit. No answer, just voicemail. Paranoid, Carmen stormed down the street en route to the Kaligaris family home. Just to be certain.

Lena stared at Kostos. Her mouth was open, gaping like a fish. It took her a second to remember that this was the boy she loved. Well, the man she loved. Sometimes she forgot that she was now a part of the adult world, though only just. It was still weird for her to think of him as a man because of this. She glanced up at him and realized that he was standing there looking at her with the same amused expression he had worn the last time he had randomly showed up to surprise her with a visit. She hadn't been wearing a shirt then, but being caught off guard in front of all these people made her feel more exposed than she had been two summers ago.

And what about that? The last time she had seen him he had been married. His "wife" - she remembered the adult thing - his wife had been in a family way. Before he had left her to be a gentleman to a woman he barely knew, their short time together had been filled with passion, though slightly restricted because of his insistence on being a gentleman. She had wanted to show him her love in every way that she could think of. Emotionally, spiritually...physically.

Somewhere in the vicinity below her Lena could hear the muffled sound of her phone ringing. She didn't acknowledge it and continued to gape at Kostos. She remembered the adult thing again and coerced herself into not being so chicken-like. She vaguely remembered the courage of the pants, and despite the tragic state of the Sisterhood, she extracted courage from whatever there was to extract from. Who said you needed to physically wear the pants to access their magic?

"Kostos. Why are you here?" Lena panicked silently in her mind as soon as the question had left her mouth, afraid that she had come across irritated instead of the calm cool collected person that she clearly was at that moment. So much for the courage.

Kostos grinned boyishly at her, "Do you want the real answer or the one that I would tell your parents?"

Lena's heart lightened slightly. "Both, please." She felt the corners of her mouth pull up shyly.

"I'm here to continue my internship. I grew up on Smithsonian magazine and I'm staying with the Sirtises in Chevy Chase." He ticked these off on his fingers, mocking himself. "Did I forget anything?"

Lena smiled at him. "Nope."

Then Kostos leaned down to Lena's ear and whispered, "But mostly I'm here for you, because I wasn't before. I have paid dearly for that."

Lena looked up at him speechlessly. She didn't know what to say. She was curious about his wife, the baby, but another part of her hoped he was done being a gentleman so she could jump his bones. Still, she was herself.

"What about your wife? The baby?"

A surge of anger and frustration settled over his face. It highlighted the lines on his forehead as they crumpled up, searching for the right words. "I cannot speak of the details intimately because it all causes me a great deal of pain, but I will tell you all that you need to know. Marianna never brought a child into this world. She caused me great pain and I divorced her, disappointing my grandparents. The moment I signed the papers I bought a ticket to the United States to come to you. I hoped that the smallest bit of you would still love the fool that stands before you.

Lena's eyes were brimming with tears. They were not tears of despair or melancholy. They were not of joy or anger. They were tears of love. Her wide, celery colored eyes forgave Kostos and loved him for his struggles and pain. She stood up and placed her hands on Kostos' chest. She rose up on her tiptoes and gave him a kiss on the lips. Her kiss was an expression of her forgiveness and understanding. She briefly and intimately informed him that she was willing to be his love again and for always.

And he eagerly returned the sentiment.


	11. Chapter 10

Finally she could see the roof of Lena's house. As she got closer, the house became more and more visible from the top down. Her heart raced as she strained to pump her short legs more...she hadn't had to run this fast since her last tennis season in high school. Needless to say she was out of breath and ready to fall over after about 50 feet, but still, Carmen trekked on. As she got closer she arched her neck to get a view of the driveway. She continued to run, with her flip-flops smacking on the cement. A few houses away Carmen slowed, but while doing so the bottom of her plastic shoe bent under her foot and she tripped. Her balance kicked in and she did a weird double-step to avoid falling. She stumbled and stopped her movement. As soon as she registered that she was safe her head popped up to examine the state of Lena's driveway. No car. Lena wasn't home. Fury and panic overloaded Carmen's brain.

Rational Carmen stopped by for a visit. What if Effie had taken the car? It had been hers for most of the year. She had a life, a job, and always had much more going on socially than Lena. Therefore, Carmen deduced, Lena must be inside. Silently Carmen cursed herself for not checking her computer or calling Lena's home phone before she spazzed out. Rational Carmen continued to taunt with her good ideas. Carmen new Lena hardly had her cell phone on and the few times she did she never bothered to answer it. Stealthily Carmen pulled her cell out of her pocket and called Lena's house.

Carmen listened to the tone. One Ring. Two. Carmen's teeth gnashed. Three, she could feel her face getting warm.

"Hello?"

"Hello...Effie?

"Carmen?"

"Yeah. Is Lena there? It's important." Why did she say that? No it wasn't. She was paranoid and crazy.

"Ummm..." Carmen knew she had just woken Effie up. She was slow and cranky. Previous experience told Carmen that the more urgent it seemed, the slower Effie would go. She silently cursed herself and Karma for teaching hear a lesson about sanity.

"No. She's not. She must have gone someplace because the car isn't here...Wait? Are you standing outside?"

"No! Not me. At home. Thanks, Eff. Gotta go. Bye." Carmen shut her phone with a defining click and darted up the street, left only with her restless paranoid self.

Bridget looked around. She was all alone in Greta's house. Her uncle Perry had wordlessly grabbed her duffel bag and gone up the steps after the doctor left. It was difficult to explain how she felt at that moment. Unease. Panic. What were certain was the jitters in her quads attempting to coerce her into running. Possibly for the first time in her life Bridget ignored her nagging muscles. She was certain that Greta needed her. Bee would stay put, not that there was any doubt she would leave. The challenge that faced her was, in essence, reality.

In an attempt to calm her case of the jumpies Bridget walked around the lower level of the house. She gazed at all the different picture frames and ceramic doo-dads that every grandmother in the world seemed to have. The old, musty furniture had fallen victim to a moth feast. The sudden harsh appearance of the room forced Bridget to look around. It was now that she noticed the thick layer of dust on the objects scattered around the room. Suddenly everything seemed to move farther and farther away for Bee until her back hit something hard. The wall. Right. Not moveable, at least, not by her own strength. A sudden image in her mind of the wall falling away caused Bee to jump forward. She was scared. She was in Greta's house, but it was as if Greta had been gone for quite some time. Everything she looked at was a constant reminder of Greta's possible death. Either way, the image before her gave Bridget a sudden feeling of loss that buried a hole inside her chest.

This posed a problem for Bridget. She couldn't leave the house, she wouldn't let herself. She couldn't go upstairs because she was afraid. She couldn't stay where she was because it scared her. She closed her eyes and paced back and forth, only to think of an idea seconds later. Moments later she was standing outside the door that would grant her access to her solution. She yanked on the doorknob. It wouldn't budge. It was apparent that it had been a long time since it had been opened. The giant hole inside Bee's chest grew a little bigger and maybe a little heavier. Either way, it gave her strength. She gave a greater tug and the door flew open. Bridget stumbled backward but regained her balance before falling.

She didn't hear her uncle coming down the stairs; he had heard a loud noise and came downstairs to investigate. He hadn't turned the corner before he was met with Mighty Bee. Armed with cleaning supplies, Bridget was prepared to conquer the dust. While Bridget had conquered her past in the attic, upstairs, it was time to conquer her present downstairs. If Uncle Perry had rounded the corner the area in close proximity to the closet door would give the impression that the cleaning supplies aisle at Wal-Mart had thrown up. Bridget had already dragged her booty to the various parts of the room that needed immediate work.

Constant movement was exactly what she had needed. The strain in her shoulder muscles satisfied her eager legs as she dusted and buffed the doo-dads and the surfaces on which they lay. Despite the years of cleaning ahead of her, she would move until she couldn't, a casualty of the fatigue that only cleaning provides. She would move until her lungs were clogged with dust, until her back was sore from all the contortions, until her legs would support her weight no more, and then probably, she would move some more. Bridget couldn't stand the thought of Greta upstairs sick and all alone. If she was up there while the rest of her home mourned her pre-mature passing, then Bee would find little hope for her recovery. The seemingly dark room would give her energy until light sparkled all around her.

Tibby was in a bad way. After the sun had begun to rise Tibby left the cemetery and headed home. She had gotten very little sleep since she had come home from school -- even less before that. A few blocks down she turned a corner and found herself on a street full of commercial businesses. As she passed a local merchants window she glanced at her reflection and began to cry a little. Her reflection made her think of the past few months. The things she had done to Carmen, herself, others...had taken a toll on her body and her psyche. It was lonely in the city for Tibby and the one thing that once made her feel alive now left her worse off than she had ever imagined.

_There are many drugs in the world_, Tibby mused. Thanks to many lectures and videos in health class Tibby had never actually done drugs, nor wanted to, but she didn't need to experience it herself to know what an addiction felt like. Drugs give you brief satisfaction and escape from your  
hellish world. They only leave you knowing full well that the hell you thought you were in was Heaven compared to where the drug left you. Win wasn't even Tibby's drug. Tibby was Tibby's drug -- her own enemy. Making her life miserable by going to New York for school and then feeling the need to seek something, anything to help cure her loneliness. Why she chose blissful abandon was beyond her. Maybe it was because it presented itself conveniently on her couch as opposed to dragging her butt to some loud obnoxious club full of real drugs. The worst part of Tibby's addiction was that she kept going back to that initial evening in her mind. Each time she did she felt a familiar rush in her veins. Every detail, every sensation she experienced in her mind. When she came back to reality she craved his body like a coke addict craves a hit. It hurt so bad to want that much. It hurt so bad to betray Carmen and the Sisterhood that way. Still, Tibby couldn't help it.

A bus stop was nearby and Tibby made her way over to it. She boarded the next bus and sat in the back, ignoring the stares of society's productive members. She's looked this way before and she didn't care much either, her focus was channeled into one outlet, similar to that of a coke addict seeking a hit. Unaware of the sweat on her skin, Tibby was focused on nothing but sweet release to help her deal with the stresses of her life. Like a struggling recovering addict she talked herself into it, out of it. Her reflection in the window next to her seat dictated her thoughts. Her mere image convinced her of all the trouble it's caused her. Finally, she stopped looking, got up and blindly walked off the bus when it arrived at her stop.


	12. Chapter 11

Tibby stood there in the sun, which continued to beat down upon her scalp. Distantly, the sound of the bus puttering away could be heard. She had given herself two choices: forget the pain, embrace her thrill and dismiss the crumpled ruins of her life. This was the first. If Tibby hadn't been met with undeserved love and forgiveness, she would very likely be standing in front of door numero uno at this very moment. But Tibby felt the wreckage was so much easier to face now that she was certain her friends had not turned their backs on her. She wholeheartedly relied upon them.

So there she stood in front of Carmen's new house. She couldn't bring herself to knock, she knew Carmen needed her space from Tibby. But Still, Tibby didn't want to be apart from her. So there she stood, watching the house. It occurred to her that this was not so inconspicuous and she opted instead to sit on the front step, feeling close to Carmen and far from destruction.

* * *

Carmen was on another planet. It was unbearably hot, she couldn't breathe, and the skin on the soles of her feet were on fire. At least that was how one would feel running in the hot summer sun when one happened to be wearing flip flops and had no destination in mind. Carmen was driven by pure emotion and a twinge of paranoia. Tibby had rocked her world -- if Carmen couldn't trust her, then who _could_ she trust? Carmen's internal homing device managed to take over and direct her to her street. With her home in view, Carmen slowed to a walk and caught her breath as she headed toward home. She could feel her heart slow down. Her breathing returned to normal. All was find in Carmenland until she actually got home, where she found Tibby waiting for her on the front steps.

Tibby looked up when she saw Carmen approach. "Carmen..." she was surprised. Tibby had thought Carmen was inside.

"Tibby?" Carmen was confused. Her head was still a little fuzzy from the running and the brief insanity binge. She was mad. "What are you doing? Why are you here?" She made no effort to hid her anger.

Tibby looked caught. She couldn't explain her thoughts to Carmen. She opted to respond with silence. Her emotions wore heavily in her chest. Tibby couldn't cry. She wanted to and her tears were on call: she was broken inside, but refused to shed a tear. Her attempt and a cool exterior was anything but. She showed signs of struggle in her body language and in the lines across her forehead. The corners of her lips were trying very hard to not pull down.

Carmen wanted nothing to do with any of this -- including her previously issued forgiveness. She had spent her morning freaking out all over Bethesda because of Tibby. The hitch in her side, the dirt on her feet, and the mascara running down her face, all of it was Tibby's fault.

"Tibby! I can't do this. Any of this. I can't see you, I can't talk to you, I can't think about you. Most of all, I can't forgive you! You broke me! I'm supposed to be able to trust you!" Carmen yelled. "If I...If I can't trust..." Carmen was struggling now. She would not let her tears betray her. She was angry and couldn't let her tears of sadness cut her anger short just yet. She took a deep gulp of air. "If I can't trust you, then who can I trust? You broke me. You broke my belief in everyone. In the Sisterhood. And for that, I can't forgive you." Carmen took a deep breath and strode past Tibby into her house.

Tibby was stunned. The one thing that had been holding her together just blew up in her face. To her, Carmen's lvoe and forgiveness was everything. Without it, Tibby had nothing. Bridget was not there and Lena's support was conditional on Carmen's acceptance. Why did Tibby need to do the right thing now? It was hard and it left Tibby with nothing. She had hit rock bottom and was worthy only of the company who had pushed her off the side of the cliff. She had no strength left.

Tibby got back on the bus. She sat down. She stood up. She got off. She found herself ringing a doorbell and being invited inside. When Tibby went to bed that night, she wasn't alone, and she certainly wasn't clothed.

* * *

**Sorry this is so short! Of all my pages that I've written, some seem to have disappeared on me. For example, the juicy stuff that immediately follows this.**

**I'm going to keep looking, it can't have gone far.**

**In the meantime, enjoy. Please R&R, it's literally the only reason I bother to update at all.  
**


	13. Author's Note

Aw guys.

I just had someone add this to their Fav Stories list and the e-mail prompted me to put a note up on this story.

I started this story in 2006 before we even had _Forever in Blue_. I remember writing chapters during my study hall when I was in high school. I remember writing more updates in the warm sunshine during a break in between classes my first week as a junior in college.

However, now, I can wholeheartedly say that _Sisterhood Everlasting_ shattered my heart into a million pieces. I can't even begin to think about these characters and I doubt I'll ever feel motivated to finish this fic.

I wanted to apologize to all of you because I remember being .determined. that I wouldn't let this be another promising fic that got abandoned.

If you enjoy my writing, I'm considering writing some Glee fanfiction. I haven't written any yet, as I'm working on two other stories at the moment. But I do have some fun Glee fic ideas for my ships (OTP: Brittana, Crack!OTP: Quinntana).

You can also follow me on tumblr. My username on there is the same as here. 98% of my posts are about women's soccer or Glee.

A sincere thank you to everyone who has followed this story, reviewed, or added it to their favorite story or watch list. I never would have written as much as I did without you.


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